Ho there, Christmas questers!
We at Tabletop Beard were just thinking about holiday films. Let’s be honest, a lot of times we see Santa in the movies, his beard is large, stark white, and very fake looking.
This could be for a lot of reasons. For example, maybe the actor who stepped in to represent the jolly St. Nick could not grow an actual beard. Or maybe they just did not try.
We are looking at you, Billy Bob Thorton. Your movie BAD SANTA (although funny) had a bad Santa beard. And Billy Bob did not even try to keep that fake beard on. We’re afraid it, along with other things, totally broke the illusion of him being Santa…lol.
However, there are actors who have truly invested themselves into the role of Santa and either grew a nice beard or managed to find a fake one that looked real enough. Let’s not spoil the truth about Santa’s beard and just assume the ones on this list were real.
ELF – Ed Asner
It’s hard to avoid the hit movie Elf during the holiday season. Will Ferrel really knocked this one out of the park back in 2003 and every year it is a staple for many families who build “must watch” Christmas movie lists.
But what about Santa? Can you clearly picture who played him? Here is a hint. It was a famous actor and he looked very much the part of the role.
Ed Asner played Santa in Elf and his beard looked great. In many ways it looked real, as far as those stark white ones go. You could almost see the lines the comb made in it. Which makes us happy that Santa knows the importance of grooming his beard.
That being said, Ed Asner’s beard looked like it could have used a little beard balm to keep it under better control. We have what you need here, Santa.
The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe – James Cosmo
So many of us grew up reading the Narnia books. So, when the movies were made, we all jumped on board.
For this young reader, one of the things that stood out in the movie was when James Cosmo, someone you might remember from Highlander or Braveheart, appeared as Father Christmas.
The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe was released in 2005 and James Cosmo was 57 at the time, granted he looked like he was 77 with his long straggly light grey hair and beard.
His beard looked real because it appeared dry and brittle. The winter weather has a way of drying out facial hair, so wouldn’t it be nice if someone gave him a gift of beard oil?
Which scent do you think he would like? We have a few he might like, maybe some Winter Solstice?
The Christmas Chronicles – Kurt Russell
When not driving the Pork Chop Express, or crashing cars as Stuntman Mike, Kurt Russell is steering Santa’s sleigh and rocking a killer beard.
In 2018, The Christmas Chronicles was released and to everyone’s surprise, Kurt made an amazing-looking Santa. And guess what, that beard was at least 80% real!
Yep, Kurt grew most of it himself! And we bet he used all the best beard care products on it, because it looks pretty healthy.
What did you think of his portrayal of Santa? Better yet, what did you think of his killer beard? Any guesses which scent Kurt Russell would choose? We say, Rogue.
Miracle on 34th Street – Richard Attenborough
This is the 1994 version, not the original one. Yes, there was one made way back in 1947! Crazy right! And it’s a classic. Check it out sometime.
In the 1994 version of Miracle on 34th Street, we are rewarded with the loveable Richard Attenborough (yes, the Jurassic Park guy) playing the role of Kris Kringle and wow, he looks great!
In fact, I am going to believe that his beard is 100% real.
Not only that, I bet Sir Richard Attenborough brushed his beautiful Santa beard several times a day to get it to wrap around his face like that. If you would like to know what tools to use when grooming your beard, we have a perfect article for you to check out here.
Ernest Saves Christmas – Douglas Seale
We saved the best for last. A true classic. Just kidding!
Although Ernest Saves Christmas is a cult classic, this 1988 movie is unceremoniously left off most people’s holiday movie watchlists. Which is sad, because Ernest Saves Christmas is one of the higher rated movies of the ten Ernest movies he made.
Okay…okay…that’s not saying much. Sorry, Ernest, we tried. We still loved you in Ernest Scared Stupid.
One thing Ernest Saves Christmas does right is cast Douglas Seale as Santa with bad memory loss. Seale was a British classical actor/producer/director who popped up in a lot of things back in the day.
But in this movie, he played a believable Santa with a realistic beard. Not one of those giant white as snow things. Nope, he wore a beard that any man his age could have been wearing. And if properly cared for that beard would glisten and sparkle like diamonds under the light of a Christmas tree.
We applaud you for wearing a beard that looked so nice, Douglas.
Honorable Mention – Violent Night – David Harbour
David is well known for his role in Stranger Things. We’ve seen him grow a beard on that show, as well as wear one in the Black Widow Marvel movie.
So, could this Santa beard be real? Like really-real? Let’s pretend it is.
In Stranger Things, he grew a beard during captivity, and we guess the gulag did not have lots of premium beard care products for him to use. Of course, if you had the address of that Russian prison, we send a few sampler packs there to help the other prisoners take better care of their facial hair. It’s the least we can do.
It appears David grew a beard and just kept it from one acting gig to another. There are lots of promotional photos of him with it.
Granted he spent his share of nights on popular late-night shows and red carpets, but let’s be honest, sometimes David looked a little unkempt.
There is no reason to look so disheveled David, all you need is to read up on some simple and easy-to-apply beard care tips and tricks.
Ho! Ho! Ho!
No matter if you are Santa or one of his hard-working elves, you can look your best by adding simple beard care into your daily routine.
It starts with keeping your beard clean, and then hydrating it with some beard oil or beard butter. Lastly, style it. Make it look nice. Apply some beard balm to tame those flyaways before taking that romantic sleigh ride across the night sky with Ms. Santa.
Hey, she knows when you are bad or good too. Just saying… 😉